Fatigue

I wonder sometimes if there is really a point to any of this. I have the feeling that I am just going through the motions of 'life' and that I am not really living. I am just so tired, so very tired. I wonder about the choices I have made, the things I have done (or not) and I have reached a point in which I do not savor much. 

I am tired. Tired of battling for such things I feel should not be as hard. And I don't know where all of this is going.

Just Say so!

There are many things I don't get, and it seems never will... I shall provide examples: why is it people don't say NO when they know for a fact that they won't  or are u willing or can't do something ??? Instead, they no longer pick up the phone or write back. WTF is up with that? Some sort of shame? Not wanting to lose face ? Hellloooo? 

Another thing : don't say u understand, when clearly u are clueless or have no idea on what to do. Again, no shame in saying "sorry, explain, I did not get it"... 

Urgh.

Positive... continued

I know I said that I would write on a daily basis and chronicle the good as well as the bad here. I have not been able to do so because I have been genuinely looking for reasons. Saying that I am thankful for the Sun, my Parents, the Family, etc. These you can have anywhere in the world and they are not particular to Tunisia. I figure I won't complain and talk about the negatives, at least, not until I have something meaningful and positive to write about... 

So I am feeling very positive about summer work hours (lame, but hey...). From July 1st to August 31st of every year, we have modified work hours to accomodate for the heat here (it does get around 40+ degrees in the shade). It enables us, to pretty much work around 35 hours a week instead of the 40. 

I will come up with something which has more "depth" in the near future...

The positive

2 days ago, I hear my door bell go off at 8am. I was getting ready to go to work and was not expecting anyone. I opened the door and 2 young ladies (bless their souls) told me that I had forgotten my car key in my door!!! I has forgotten the night before the key in the car door when taking the groceries out... This is a very positive thing. 

Pseudo parking pisses me off...

Seeing the positive

So I've decided to write on a daily (I hope) basis a positive comment or comment about life here, and to also vent a little and write about something that pisses me off. This would be in the form of text or photo. 

Not in the mood

Anger has relinquished it's sad and cold place to its friend anxiety. That is what I am feeling now. I am still trying to figure my feelings out and understand the root of all this emotion... Could it be hormones? Could it be the crazy driving of my country men? I wonder about the trigger. It is making me something I don't like and it is making me tired. Not sure what to do to snap out of it.

Pissed off

I am angry. I am not willow sure how it happened but I find myself feeling this intense and powerful anger. Angry at drivers who honk all the time and drive super fast and don't respect basic driving rules. Angry at all the trash on the street and how people just don't give a damn about it. Angry at our politicians who are spending their time arguing and not finding solutions. Angry at our youth who for reasons that I do not know or comprehend have become so totally and completely apathetic, jaded, and disillusioned. Angry at employers who have (and still are) exploited their employees. Angry at how difficult it is to have a normal and simple relationship.
And I don't like it when I am angry. It tires me. It makes me have something like anxiety attacks. I am not sure where all of this is going. I just need to vent a little. It has been a while.