New beginning... again...

As I write this post, I am brushing my hair, and feeling the pimple that has just decided to form on my forehead. I just took a shower to try to relax, but I just can't seem to calm down... Tomorrow is the first day of my new job. I guess this is going to be my 3rd first new day in a serious environments. There were many others, but I think that those 3 were the toughest... anyways. My skin is showing signs of stress, and I am totally unable to sleep. All I can think about is my first day at my first "real" job...

I guess this was over six years ago. I remember that I had spent the evening before, a good couple of hours deciding on the outfit I was going to wear. I was going to work for a serious place, that employed thousands of people throughout the world, with many office buildings, and a lot of different people. I needed to make the right impression. I needed to put all there is to put on my side because I had started with a 3-month contract... Finally the outfit was picked. Finally I was able to get some rest.

The following morning, my stomach was rumbling. Alas, it was not hunger. It was good old stress that was taking a nasty turn and taking revenge on my poor stomach (it is always the victim of my uncounscioussness). I could barely drink something before leaving the apartment. On my way to the elevator, I had to rush back home and ... well... vomit. I grabbed some ginger ale, and headed back, even more stressed now by the fact that I might be getting late.

Half-way through the metro ride, I had to exit the metro, throw up in a trash, and get back on. My stomach was empty, but it was just rebelling. I finally made it to work, pale, shivering, and tense. I was fortunate enough to have a lovely older colleague who could understand the stress I was going through... That day went ok, my stomach took some time to settle, but it eventually did.

That job lasted me close to five years... I know beginnings are always difficult. Any "first" is hard, but such is life... I am sure that tomorrow will be great and that all this stupid stress will be remembered as an obligatory stupid thing.

Most of all, I hope that this job is "it" and that I will be able to actually have a career. All the signs seem to indicate that it will be possible. I shall do my best, work like a mule, and get to where I want.