Some time ago, when I still was a student, I got an article published on the concept of regret. In it I said (more or less) that regret was reserved for those who do not think properly about the things that they want to do.
Basically, I have a rather simple way to view things.... This "concept" of life was developed with time, and it is of course, still a work in progress. I do believe that if you are in a situation and you have to decide on your course of action, your best bet is to stop and think. Think about what you are doing to do and think about the consequences.
If you are willing to live with the consequences of whatever you will be doing, if you can assume what might happen, and you do this thinking rationally and truly accept your reasoning, then, and only then, can you live with your actions without regret. Because think about it... You've thought about what you were going to do, you accepted the consequences, you should be able to live without regret.
I know it's easier said than done. But here comes the concept of responsibility. As a grown-up, if you think (and I hope you do), and accept your thinking, you should be responsible enough to assume the consequences of your actions. This is truly an exercise that one goes through constantly, a sort of mental discipline to get yourself used to this viewpoint.
One has to juggle every day with all kinds of decisions. Our lives are getting more and more complex, and the more we interact with others, the more we are faced with situations that put us in difficult situation... We can regret many things: a person we left behind, a lie we said, a moment we let pass, a missed opportunity, getting tempted, not getting tempted, time we did not spend with a loved one, a word said in anger, a word not said at the right time...
When you really think of it, the best rule in life is to just move forward... Regret will not take you anywhere. Learn from your mistakes and don't waste your time crying over last opportunities. It won't do you any good; it can only pull you further from moving on.
Anyways... I guess the most difficult part of this is the thinking process that one needs to go through before deciding... It's also very difficult to truly assume your actions... One has to find one's proper balance to live and be...
Thoughts?
2 comments:
I agree with your view. The biggest decision I made in my life was my marriage with my Tunisian husband. My parents weren't happy, and I had to give up my study. It changed the course of my life completely, but I have no regret. Although it hasn't been easy, I know I did the best I could at the time of the decision, and have done the best to keep up our life. As you say, you just have to take your own responsibility. My boss at work says you will always win if you continue until you win. Isn't that truthful? (my blog: http://tunisiajapan.blogspot.com/)
Vivre dans le regret? NON. Je ne vis qu'une fois, et je ne veux pas avoir de regrets dans ma vie. Il est vrai qu'il est difficile d'agir dans un sens ou dans l'autre, sans que le sentiment de regret ne nous envahisse. C'est tout un exercice ou un art pour être au dessus. La seule question qui me revient, est ce qu'avce le temps ne vais je pas avoir des remords ou regrets.
Aujourd'hui si je vis une certaine aventure, est ce que le regret serait de mettre mis dans cette histoire ou plutot de ne pas m'impliquer a fond sans être conscient des conséquences.
Les regrets ne nous rattrapent que dans notre inconscient, nos rêves... Par contre vivre dans le mensonge, je crois que nous sommes plus préparés et conditionnés.
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